FHM gives The Bob Narley Show 5 Stars!

I love a good review, so please excuse me if I brag a little.
One of my favorite magazines, FHM, has awarded The Bob Narley Show with it's highest rating; 5 Stars.

"A great blend of music and bizarre content."

Thanks FHM, I couldn't have put it better myself.

If you can make them laugh..

I was talking with a fellow student from Second City today and he told me a story about his boss. We were discussing live performances and the people who can simply walk into a room and automatically start entertaining a crowd. He mentioned that his boss could never stay mad at him, no matter what he did wrong. The reason his boss gave made complete sense. “I can never stay mad at anybody who makes me laugh.”

You know, I thought, damn that’s right. It’s easy to forgive those who make us laugh.

POT: Cannabis isn't as harmless as suggested

My wife and I often debate on the harmlessness of marijuana. Today, I found this information fixed to my studio monitor.

From USA WEEKEND Sept. 16-18, 2005

Cannabis is the most widely used illicit drug in the United States. Two recent studies show that cannabis damages the vessels in your brain by constricting blood flow - putting you at risk for stroke.

It makes no difference whether you smoke it, eat it or take a pill. The active ingredient tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) is the culprit. The stronger it's concetration - ranging from 1% in some herbal preparations to 65% in some hashish oils - the greater the danger.

Long-term and heavy users are at risk.

Cannabis has long been associated with harmful changes in the brain; now sophoisticated medical tools can pinpoint them. One study demonstrates that impairment of the brain's blood flow persists for at least a month after the last high. This eventually can lead to a stroke and its resulting paralysis, and problems with vision, memory and speech.

well....

I'm at a loss for an argument. anybody?

Hello Chicago Radio - The New Gig!

I'm very excited to say that I have been offered a gig in Chicago Radio, and of course I quickly accepted it.

I wish I could say more. Time will tell the tale.

I'm really looking forward to doing radio in my hometown, and welcome the opportunity that has been presented to me.

It looks like the most exciting chapter of my radio career has yet to be written.
I couldn't be more pleased.

What a great day!

Hello Chicago!

Bubba The Love Sponge on SIRIUS

Fans of my show are most likely familiar with Todd “Bubba the Love Sponge” Clem, and our strange history. Today I have some news about my old adversary and fellow broadcaster. Howard Stern announced on Friday (9/9) that Bubba the Love Sponge will be the first big-name hire for his SIRIUS SASTELLITE RADIO channels. “When somebody gets so screwed over by the government,” Stern Said, obviously referring to Bubba’s firing by Clear Channel, “it sickens me.”

You may remember that Bubba was fired from 98Rock and the rest of the Clear Channel family, as well as, all of his syndication deals after the FCC slapped him with a fine so massive that his head spun around and he hasn’t worked in radio since. POW.

Truth be told, I’m not a fan of Bubba the Love Sponge, however I do admire the creative talents that previously worked alongside of him. Specifically, I’m talking about Manson, who also performed the popular character voice of “Ned” on the show. Will Bubba be able to bring these talents with him to SIRIUS? They have all moved on to have their own radio careers now, will they want to give that all up to work with Bubba? Maybe? Who knows?

The big question is how successful will Howard Stern be on SIRIUS? And how successful will his “channels” be?

In my opinion it’s crucial that Bubba be able to hire Manson back on to the team. Without Manson, I’m afraid Bubba’s show will seem week, and given the limited audience of Satellite Radio, a week show will not last long, no matter who is backing it.

My thoughts on Satellite radio are that it might be a technology that will become obsolete even before it reaches enough popularity to be profitable. 5 million portable iPod type MP3 players will ship this year, and Podcasting is only gaining momentum. Take into consideration that 650 Million cell phones will ship this year. What will happen when the common cell phone can store enough audio to say “Download your favorite Podcast” for the day?

My cell phone can already download and store over 1 gig worth of audio, however it is in the minority. Verizon and Sprint are already advertising their latest phone releases that incorporate the ability to store audio.

I still believe that “On Demand” audio is the future of what was called broadcasting, and that the personalities that can adapt to this technology will ride the wave to financial reward and notoriety.

So, what of Bubba? Who Cares? He’s lucky to get a Satellite gig, and while I would never wish the FCC to crack down on any DJ in the way that they did to him, I truly believe it couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy. Karma’s a bitch. I honestly wish him the best of success. Maybe Satellite will offer him the venue he needs to talk more about Hulk Hogan while sucking snot through his nose and gasping for air over the microphone.

Hurricane Katrina Victims - Let's Throw Them Money

I can’t say enough about how sympathetic I feel about the many unfortunate survivors of hurricane Katrina. It truly is a horrible tragedy.

With that said; America has once again risen to the occasion and started sending aid and relief money to the victims. At least this time it’s for residents of our own country who might even appreciate it. U-Haul’s from churches and generous companies, filled to the hilt with supplies and old clothes are making the journey to the Deep South to try and re-supply those who decided that a category 5 hurricane was nothing to worry about when living in a coastal city below sea level.

Am I the only kid whose parents told them the fairy tale about The Three Little Pigs?

O.K., I should be fair. New Orleans and the surrounding area is a heaven for the poor and underprivileged, many of whom could not afford to leave their homes even if they were lucky enough to own a car. That city has been dying a slow mournful death for years, and many of the remaining residents live in a state of total poverty. I have personally lived in a similar situation and fully understand the position that many of those families were in. Fair enough.

So, now what?

FEMA, in all its wisdom, decided to start handing out CASH in the form of debit cards. Already, there have been two separate reports of these debit cards being used to purchase Gucci handbags.

Are we really surprised?

If handing cash over to the poor and underprivileged solved any problem, then welfare would actually work. The logic of giving cash to the majority of these people boarders on insane. Leave it to our government to think this problem can be solved by throwing money at it.

OK, OK, I’m bitching away like the Wednesday morning meeting of the Junior Women’s Club. I can’t help it, I’m pissed off, because I know damn well that this ridiculous waste of CASH money is going to come out of our pockets.

How about a solution?

Yeah, I got one. One word, one answer! EDUCATION

Education, I honestly believe it to be the answer. Let’s see, we can either start relocating all these poor families to other cities, where they will live tax free, draining our limited resources and milking this crisis for all it’s worth. It seems like it’s already worth a Gucci handbag. OR…..

Or.. we can take this cash money we are throwing at them and use it to EDUCATE these people.

Teach them new trades.
Educate them on how to balance a checkbook and live on a budget.
Teach them how to file and pay their taxes.
Educate them about the danger of living below sea level, especially in a coastal city.
Teach them about the destructive force of hurricanes.
Educate them on what a LOAN is.

O shit, did I say that. A loan?

That’s right; I believe that all this CASH relief should be a LOAN. Make them pay it back, even if it’s only at $25 a month. Make them pay it back.

What, it’s a year later and you’re still unemployed? Then I got a great job for them. Here is a bucket and a mop. You see that city over there? You clean it up.

Do I sound too harsh? Should I still be crying about the horrible tragedy of it all? Maybe.

Yes, feed the hungry. Help the children. Comfort the elderly. Stabilize the situation.
And then…
Stop throwing our cash around, and use our countries resources for a REAL solution.

Educate these people and teach them to help themselves.

Every survivor who is able, every man and woman who is old enough to work and help out, all of them should be the first in line to pay it all back. That’s right! Earn it!

Is their life ruined? Do they need a fresh start? Fair enough, I welcome every survivor with open arms and a stern eye. I’ll help, if you will learn to help yourself. I will feed your children, if you promise to learn a new trade and get a new job and lean to feed them yourself. You can ride with me to work in the morning, if you promise to work hard all day and bring home a paycheck.

I believe that there are many honorable, decent people who have been profoundly hurt in this horrible tragedy, and they all need our help. I believe that many of these people would rather this never happened that be forced into the position of relying on others generosity. I believe that these people truly appreciate our support and are grateful for the amazing response of our nation. I believe these people will be the first to get back on their feet and rebuild their lives and resume the role of honest caring Americans in our society. I also believe that these people will be the fist to pay back the loan, and they will do so gladly, thankful for the opportunity.

Unfortunately, I also believe that there are far too many people, right now, who will ride out the generosity so graciously offered by the American people, sucking every nickel and dime from this, for as long as they possibly can. They will scream victim and offer excuses as to their plight, all the while sitting on their ass waiting for their next CASH debit card to arrive in the mail.

I’m so proud of the response that the American people offer in times of need. I just hope that this amazing gratuity is not abused, for that would diminish it and lessen the name of a great city.